For as long as I can remember, I loved writing stories. It’s always something that I enjoyed playing about with on the computer. When self-publishing on Amazon came along, I was even more inspired to actually write a book.

Becoming a traditionally published author didn’t really interest me in the beginning, as I wanted to write for fun, not for pressure. Once I’d written my first book (Facing Charlie), I decided to submit to a few literary agents. There were some who replied, some who didn’t, but in the end, it didn’t matter, as none were interested in my novel.

Although it stung a little bit, I was generally feeling ok about it. After all, Facing Charlie was my first novel and more of a test run. I ended up making the cover myself and going through the process of self-publishing.

After that, I caught the writing bug and managed to release multiple books every year since. However, I felt quite demoralised since I was getting no sales, really, other than for my book Who Are We To Be. I did some paid advertising through Amazon as well as just free posts on social media. I created a couple of trailers and reels, but it didn’t seem to make much difference.

For a while, I wanted to be a writer and then I gave up on that dream.

The thing is, since I’ve allowed myself a few months to breathe, I realised that I do really want to be a writer. It’s something that I love doing and I always have stuff to say. But I don’t want to be just a fiction writer. That’s where I was getting lost.

I love writing up reviews. I love writing blog posts like this that are just thoughts. I loved writing my self-help guides on anxiety. I love writing songs. I love writing plays. I even love writing up reports for businesses. So yes, I love writing stories, but I want to write in different ways.

The beauty about wanting to be a writer is that I can write anything I want to, whether people read it or not. It’s hard to turn that into a career, but I think it’s time to focus onthe things that fulfil our souls, not just bring in money.

I have a personal development business, which is a mishmash of all the different things I love, from helping businesses to selling photographs or books. But I started to lose myself in it and lost clarity. I still hope that it’s something that I can keep going with, but ultimately, I want to work remotely.

Anxiety has always played a big factor in my adult life, which means that my options are quite limited. I’ve been lucky so far, but I guess the fear is that at some point, that luck will run out.

Regardless, I’ve decided to expect the best and be prepared for the worst. While I’m lucky enough to have the life I currently have, I should make the most of it byproducing the content I want to rather than focusing on SEO and stuff.

Basically, I want to become a writer. Not just an author but a writer who has a diverse collection. I’m working on another script for a short film, which I’ll hopefully produce this year. I am also working on a script that I can submit to a local theatre group. I have my next fiction book idea lined up and ready to go. I also have my non-fiction stuff that is waiting patiently to get written. My business book has just been neglected, as that’s almost ready to be published.

So one of my New Year’s resolutions is to write. To keep writing, but without the business side of it pulling the strings. I should allow creativity room to breathe so that I can create stuff I’m really proud of.

I’d love to know if you’ve ever felt the same with a hobby, whether it’s writing or something else.