So, the past two months have been kind of hectic, meaning I missed out on February’s word of the month. That’s one of the good things about journalling – it keeps reminding you to stay grounded and focus on the bigger picture.

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March – Courage

For March, I decided that the word I wanted to focus on was ‘courage’. I’d spent some time working on trusting my path in life (which was February’s word), and now, I wanted to work on having courage to pursue the things that are important to me.

Generally speaking, I’d say that I’m quite a brave person. As we know, bravery isn’t the absence of fear, but rather feeling the fear and doing it anyway. Having courage is very similar to bravery. It means being able to look uncertainty in the face and decide to keep pursuing what matters anyway. It means taking some risks – something that I’m notoriously bad at. It means putting yourself out there in hopes of achieving what you want to.

The sad truth is that I didn’t have time to be very courageous in March. In fact, the month flew by so quickly that I couldn’t really say what happened. The month was filled with long days, and tired weekends. The only thing I had courage with was joining an online art class which has allowed me to finally start to learn how to paint. I might not be the next Leonardo DaVinci, but it’s a wonderful hobby and the paintings aren’t awful. Aside from that, there has not been much courage from my side in March.

That being said, it is a sentiment that I can carry with me throughout the rest of the year. Whenever there is a moment of doubt because of fear, I can remember that I want to have courage and that is the time to build it. There is no expiration date on opportunities to be the person you want to become.

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February – Trust

Throughout the journalling days of this year, I realised that a number of my entries circulated around the concept of fear. Back in my school days, an advisor had suggested that I was somewhat of a ‘worrier’, something that I thought I’d outgrown. Unfortunately, my writing seemed to suggest otherwise. Every thought seemed to be clouded with some feeling of fear or uncertainty. That’s something that I didn’t want for myself. Rather than focusing on the destination, I wanted February to be a time that I can trust that the journey I’m on, is where I’m meant to be.

For the first time in my life, it meant slowing down and taking each day as it comes. I’ve always felt like it’s my responsibility to achieve a level of success and any time that I reach a certain level, I’m determined to surpass it. Countless times that has led to burnout, but it also hasn’t built the life I have always dreamed of. Instead, it left me feeling like a failure despite everything I had achieved.

So, I decided to trust the path that I’m on. I might not be able to see the destination, but sometimes that’s better. As the saying goes, make time to stop and smell the flowers. When you’re fixated on a goal, it’s easy to miss the wonders that surround you. February was the month that I decided to take that time to pause and being totally honest, it has done my mental health wonders.

It turned out that for years, I have been my own worst enemy by deciding what my life should have looked like over the years rather than appreciating what it actually is.